Tinder Surprise!

I’ve been hearing and reading a lot about this new dating app called Tinder. I’m calling it the Candy Crush of online dating, Tinder is often compared to the app Grindr; which was created for gay men…Tinder has been called the “straight” version of Grindr. But…

It’s not. Not really.

How it works: Linking your Facebook profile to the app, Tinder takes 5 of your photos, a list of your friends, and all of your interests and makes a streamlined profile for you. No extensive questionnaires, and no long list of parameters. Thank gawd.

You can edit your photos (but only using the ones that are in your Facebook profile), and adjust the two options for parameters that you have available to you. On Tinder, you can choose the age range you want to have recommended to you, and limit the options to a specific  distance (i.e. 36-49 year old males within a 20 mile radius).

The app – using your GPS – suggests options to you that are within your radius. So, there are new recommendations that will pop up if you’re at work, at home, the gym, in class…

If you like someone, yay. That’s it.

This is where I feel Tinder is different from Grindr. There’s no option to reach out or message the people you find hot…


They like you back.

It’s with that one little twist, I feel Tinder is more similar to those fleeting moments we have in real life…when we pass a hottie on the street and think to ourselves “(s)he could get it”. But that’s it. Gazing at hotties as they stroll – ahem  – scroll by.

So, if they like you back, the app sends you both a message that says “whooo hoo! You’re a match!”…or something like that. Then, it’s up to you – or the other person – to reach out and make the first move. You chat within the app, and if you decide to take it to the next level, you can.

Or, you can block them.

When compared to all the options, variables, possibilities, and outcomes that most dating sites factor in when creating their algorithms, Tinder is – surprisingly? –  simple: LIKE or NOPE?

Originally, I was going to use the app for 24 hours and report my findings…a do’s and dont’s…but darling boys…there are so many “dont’s” it’s scary.

While laughing at these mistakes (photoshopping your face on to someone else’s body? Yes, I’m going to laugh at you), I told a few girlfriends about the app. They downloaded it and blamed me for their sudden loss in productivity…the swiping action is insanely addictive.

Then…the twisted part of my mind had a thought: what if we got together…got a few drinks…and went through our Tinder options together…?

Yes, darling boys…I put a fly on the wall just for you.

This is what happens when three single women (and one who was present just to throw shade), get together over wine and Cinnabons (improv, we were on short notice!) and scroll through Tinder…


I present, a new – extended – episode of Cocktales and Cupcakes – the Tinder Surprise edition.

Listen carefully…we are offering some valuable advice.

(Part two is tomorrow…p.s. NSFW because, well…we were drinking. Language.)

(p.s. this is NOT a sponsored post…so if any of y’all want to send it to Tinder…go ahead!)


3 thoughts on “Tinder Surprise!

  1. I bellowed with laughter at the comparison to Candy Crush.

    The trick is to not swipe but just tap the x , heart or “i”, otherwise you get into this addictive swiping motion and you can’t get back to the person you want to like…or recognize… or see that you have more than one shared fb friend.

    Also – once you block someone you can’t go back do so decidedly.

    Can’t listen to the audio just yet, but looking forward to it.

    Also – you should totally start a (larger) stitch and bitch-esque group… It’d be like a book club, or a bridge club…but with Tinder…. and red wine.

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