Did your balls shrivel up a bit reading those words? Apparently, the theory goes that when you guys hear that a woman is “high maintenance”, you look for the nearest exit. Well, at least that’s what came up in conversation recently.
(“Hey, hey, hey” I protested. “I’m high maintenance, but I maintain myself!”)
At the end of the conversation, we established that a distinction needs to be made between high maintenance women and the woman who are a little more… high octane (if you will), but maintain themselves.
Presenting the 12 Women You Meet in Life: The High Level Woman
Sending me a drink ain’t appeasing/ Believe me. /Come harder this won’t be easy…
Yeah, Ms. High Level seems really stuck up when you meet her, huh? Dang. Flirty lines and jokes that worked on Comic View 10 years ago will NOT work with her, sorry…like Bey says, come harder, this will not be easy. You cannot merely send a drink to a High Level woman; a High Maintenance woman not only expects you to send her a drink, but send a round over to her and her friends to make that impression.
A High Level woman wants you to make your mark.
High Level women simply don’t trust the standard approaches. They’re tired, overused and, in the case of sending over a drink, slightly passive aggressive. For argument’s sake, if you really want to lead with a drink, try going over and offering to refresh what’s she’s having (please don’t assume you know what she’s drinking!) and see if she says yes. I will warn you right now: she’s going to challenge any and all attempts at an approach. She’s heard all the lines…she wants to hear what you have to say.
If you are the slightest bit nervous, no worries…Ms. High Level will find it endearing (to a point) but, if you go in balls blazing, she’s going to cut you off at the balls with a pithy remark or a well timed side eye. If there is one thing I can tell you, it’s this: make sure that Ms. High Level notices you before you approach. That out of the blue approach that normally works for you doesn’t work with a High Level woman. She’s scanned the room, she knows what’s there and if she didn’t notice you before, you’re just interrupting her now.
The polls indicate that pick up lines don’t work, so stop using them! Be prepared to get right to the heart of the matter and actually carry on a conversation. By the time you are done, you should have engaged her enough for her to want to continue the conversation. Ask for her number and be happy if you get a PIN. (Make sure you upgrade yourself to a phone number!). If you don’t get a number or a PIN, you were just interrupting.
Don’t doubt yourself trust me you need me…
A High Maintenance woman expects you to do for her. A High Level woman expects you to do with her. Yes, there is a difference darlings. High Maintenance women are the ones who constantly expect/request that you do things for them, because of them, to help them. They ARE grateful, don’t get me wrong…but you know those phone calls you hate getting because you know it’s (as one guy put it to me) the “request line”? That’s a High Maintenance woman.
It’s very seldom that you’re blessed to find your equal /Still play my part and let you take the lead role/ Believe me / I’ll follow this could be easy/ I’ll be the help whenever you need me/ I see you hustle with my hustle /I can keep you/Focus on your focus /I can feed you…
If you start to slack in your efforts (whatever they may be), a High Level woman will not nag you in the way a High Maintenance woman will. It won’t be an argument about what you are not doing for her, no…
She will want to know if you are still “invested” in the relationship, if there is “a point” or “a purpose” (do those phrases sound familiar to some of you?). You will not hear from a High Level woman “you don’t care about me!” or phrases of that nature…a High Level woman doesn’t not rely solely on you for emotional fulfillment.
You care about her because you care about the relationship, so instead of “you don’t care about me”, you will hear “do you care about US?” instead. If she senses that for any reason, you’re not in the relationship, she will be out the door. High Level women are your biggest supporters and your harshest critics and she will hold you up as long as you hold her up.
Oh and this isn’t about money – not always at least. Earning potential/power? Yes it’s a factor, I’m not going to lie. But everyone brings something specific to a partnership. In fact, some High Level women that I know don’t work outside the home and if they do, they’re not CEOs… but they do expect a partner in their relationship and whether that partnership is 60/40 or 50/50, you are first a partner. High Level women know what’s in the joint account, but they don’t need to borrow your credit card to buy shoes… you get that?
Partner let me upgrade you / Flip a new page / Introduce you to some new thing…
One complaint I’ve heard about a High Level woman is that she tries to change a man.
(Waits for the male readers to stop shouting “YES” and “THIS” at their monitors)
Okay, continuing on…
Sigh. This is tricky and hard for me to present to you an opinion that sways one way or the other; the opinions are split pretty evenly down the line. Some women want cookie dough (someone they can shape and make into that perfect man) and some want the cookie (a man who’s done).
A woman can easily fall in love with what will be and she can just as easily fall out of love with what used to be. The ones who want to “change” you are attempting to because they see the potential for you to be better. The ones who just want the cookie are tired of fixing up men…they’ve done it before and don’t want to do it again. They want you to already know what you want and know who you are at least at that moment.
The women will agree on this: they don’t expect you to stop growing/evolving/changing or bettering yourself… you stop doing that and you end up doing damage to the relationship. High Level women expect that your glory days will be ahead of you, not behind.
So, do you marry a High Level woman?
Let me ask you this: You think you can handle it?