Why You Love Women…

Well it started with the first one…

You know, the one who pushed anywhere from 10 – 36 hours to give you life? Yeah her.

When you were hungry she fed you

When you were sleepy she carried you to bed until you were too big to carry and even then she still tried

When you were mad, she calmed you down

When you were sick, she nursed you

She alone knew how to make you smile

On special occasions you’d get your favourite foods

Yes, she’d whup your ass when you got out of line

When you cried she comforted you.

When your dad wasn’t available, she would man up…

Anything she could not do…another woman (Auntie, Grandma, the Neighbour down the hall, your best friend’s mom) stepped in and would woman up

Then there was the next one…

She was your sister, your cousin, or your godmother’s daughter. She was family by blood or by bond. You learned at an early age that she was to be respected and protected…if she got hurt at recess on the playground…you knew you’d be whooping somebody’s ass after school.

Then there was her…

You hated her and loved her at the same time. You didn’t want to sit beside her in class but you couldn’t help but look at her from across the room. She looked different, smelled different, sounded different.  One day you walked her home and you realized that weird feeling in the pit of your stomach wasn’t because you mixed pop rocks with coke at lunch…it was love.

There was the idea of her…

You’d rip pictures out of magazines and plaster your locker with them. She was beautiful, perfect, sexy (who cares about airbrushing?) and when no one was around and you needed to rub one out, it was her face…her curves, her…well, everything that you imagined. She got you there every single time…

Then you met her…

She had the curves you could touch and she gave you that pop rocks feeling in the pit of your stomach. What had only been 2-dimensional before had now been made flesh. She let you put your hands…there and there, and cot damn! She let you put it there! She let you inside and as brief as that was, it was like crack…you had to have more (c’mon son, we KNOW you didn’t go all night that first time – she had a curfew!)…

On to the next one…

Each one was wonderful…you learned from them how you like to get head, backshots over missionary, the slap n’ tickle…whether you liked to be tied up or to tie her up. You learned that you liked it in the morning, or as soon as you got home. You learned that some needed to be cuddled, others would be dressed and out the door before you could say “thanks”, and every once in a while, you’d get that feeling and you’d stop and chill with one for a bit…call her your girl. Introduce her to the family until…

But then you made her cry…

Your words or your actions…your lack of words or inaction. In retrospect you don’t even know who was at fault…it could be that no one was to blame. Even though you kept it real and remained strong, you still feel like shit every time you think of the day that you made her cry….

Or she broke your heart…

You told no one. Not even your boy. But fuck it hurt. How could she do this? Maybe you told your sister, your cousin, or your godmother’s daughter and it was now their turn to beat the bitch up after school. Except you’re grown, so she uses the ways in which only a grown woman can to make that “bitch” pay for breaking your heart. You eventually forget how it feels until you bump into her…but you man up and move on.

On to the next one (ahem, again)…

Lather, rinse, and repeat until the pain your felt has been properly stored away in the far recess of your mind.

Then you meet…HER

She is your childhood crush, your two-dimensional fantasy, and your new first love. You don’t admit it at first, but you know this is it. With her it just feels, right…even when it’s wrong, it’s right. You realize after meeting her, that every other girl was just practice.

For her you try a little bit harder, you give a little bit more…not because you feel you have to, but because you want to. In her all questions are answered and she challenges you to ask new ones. You fuck something up…you do everything possible to make it right. With her there are no other women…with her there is no need. With her there is clarity, a voice of reason, a sidekick; not a sidepiece. With her you have a partner…not a piece of ass.

In her you see your future. In her you see your children. In her you see the best parts of yourself…

So darling boys, even if you don’t get the “point” of International Women’s Day (which is day to recognize the achievements made by women in society and to highlight how far we have to go), take this day to recognize the role these women have played in your life. From them you have learned to give love and get love, break hearts and have your heart broken, great sex and mediocre sex (which is, let’s face it, still a chance for you to bust a nut).

Remember: if it wasn’t for your mother, grandmother, auntie, sister, cousin, friend, girlfriend, pin-up fantasy, coworker, fuckbuddy, confidante, saleswoman, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, wifey, ex-wifey, sidepiece, mistress, love of your life, daughter, niece or step-daughter… you wouldn’t be the man that you are right now…


p.s. and if any of you try to play the asshole and ask why I don’t celebrate men in this way…then you obviously missed this post: http://wp.me/psFPB-3M


5 thoughts on “Why You Love Women…

  1. That’s the problem women have to many rules. Live your life without always consulting with yourself about all the 100000 thoughts running in your head.know that women are from men so if u dazed on it it’s because man gave u the ideal so chill an take us for what we are kings that’s it .no need to put nothing elese with that.all the extra mind work is just distraction.if he isn’t your type don’t get the # because what u don’t like 3 other girls will. Besides did Adam have to look for a woman ? No God gave her to him . God will always furnish man woman are the seekers.

  2. Women don’t need a day they need to cover there selves an pray for a clear mind and if u can’t understand that I can see y so many women stay pregnant,frustrated an confused is because u trying to over take your role.so hey Lil girls not to be disrespectful but know your role if your guardian raised u rite life is easy if they wanted u to over throw men then u know y life gets confusing let that man guide u an dam what the friends say u fill it in your heart its true an b carful what u say about men we born with courage so little boys quote is dangerous yal came from us we made life women delivers it but the shoes on the wall are nothing untill a foot goes in them no matter how good they look.

    • There’s so much I could respond to but can’t for a variety of reasons. As offensive as I find your comments, I’ve approved them in hopes that maybe another reader will respond to you in a way that I can’t.

      First of all, I’m an atheist. I do not believe that one simply prays for clarity.

      “Over take your role…”? No. Seriously. No. There is a huge lack of communication between men and women NOT because people don’t know their roles, but because they think that they have one. This blog was created to foster a dialogue, get people talking. The only roles in life are played by actors.

      Also, “lil girls, not to be disrespectful…” I know that this site is called “her lil’ black book”, but that’s the book. Not the person. I’m a grown ass woman. My readers are adults, call me a lil’ girl again and I’ll be happy to show you the difference between a woman and girl. You will RESPECT this space; are we clear?

      As for your show analogy…I challenge you to spend a week in my stilettos and when you, motherfucker, can do what I do and accomplish what I accomplish, then we’ll have a day to celebrate you.

      And now that I’ve written all this, be your own guardian and keep yourself off my fucking site.


  3. T, you are clearly an idiot. That being said, I’m sure you are single, lonely and probably lacked the love of a mother, grandmother, aunty, sister, or any other female a young man should look to and respect.

    Your inability to clearly state your “opinion” also leads me to believe you are poorly educated. I actually feel sorry for you.

    “God will always furnish man women are seekers”
    “Yal came from us we made life woman delivers it”

    I chose to quote these two statement for the sheer stupidity of them. I have yet to see man procreate without the assistance of a woman and vice versa. However, since you want to get all biblical, there is an instance of a woman creating life without a man, that would be the Virgin Mary’s immaculate conception, heard of it?

    Really though, your comments hardly deserve a response, so I am not going to waste any more time with this because honestly, you can’t argue with stupid.

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