The money divides…
You have a “regular” job. Maybe not the job of your dreams. But it pays you enough to pay the bills on time. She’s the CEO. So, now you think that you can’t sustain her in the lifestyle she “deserves”, and you stop trying.
She’s left wondering why you stopped calling, not why you don’t make a lot of money.
I once made the mistake of introducing two friends. One of my best friends came to visit me at work and spotted my coworker who well, kinda looked like Sofia Vegara. I made the introduction, reluctantly. She thought he was hot and it was a bonus that they were both from Colombia. He asked her out and she agreed to a first date. I as reluctant to introduce them because I knew he had a tendency to be a bit of an asshole when it came to women…
Three dates later…
He complained that she was always picking him up her car. But, he didn’t have one.
She thought he was funny and sexy.
He said she seemed like a spoiled little rich girl because her dad was a lawyer in Colombia and owned a ranch.
I was surprised because the job that we worked at together was one of the three she had. She literally worked 7 days a week.
He thought she was a little too “money oriented”because of all those jobs and her house which she couldn’t stop talking about. She had just closed on that house which she paid for on her own. In fact, she couldn’t afford a moving company to move everything, so she would move the stuff herself between shifts with a little help from friends.
Oh yeah, two of those dates were breakfast dates, because she only had 3 hours in the morning between leaving one job to go to the other. So, she’d pick him up, go to the local diner and then go to the next job.
She raved to me about his portfolio (he was photographer) and wanted to introduce him to a friend who ran a gallery.
He thought that she was flighty because she went out 4-5 nights a week.
Her full time job was being the manager of hospitality for a hotel, which meant planning parties, events, and social activities for VIP guests.
She liked that they shared the same culture, because he would understand things that other guys she dated didn’t. She liked that he was a homebody.
I broke a cardinal rule of mine and actually TOLD him what she thought of
him. Still, he felt he couldn’t compete with some of the other guys she had
dated who had expense accounts, cars and downtown lofts…so he stopped
What I didn’t do is tell HER why. I couldn’t have been more clear that she was interested if I wrote it out 100 times on a chalkboard. He essentially talked himself out of dating her.
In this case, it was his loss. It was his loss because he assumed that a well to do girl wouldn’t look past his wallet.
2 years later, she quit 2 of her jobs, got a raise, got a promotion and married one of the contractors who worked on the renovations to her house.
Lesson learned: She has her own money. She’s not asking for yours.