The Allure of Crazy Beautiful

Oh wow. My darling boys…I’ve been fielding emails and calls about a particular type of woman. You all seem to date her at one point or another, and then wonder why you do. If you ever dated a woman and used

High Strung
Nuts (as in “drives me”)
Too much

in a conversation about her or in the same sentence as her name, then you, yes you my darling boy, have dated the Crazy Beautiful. As if the universe was telling me to write this post, my friend sent me a link to the perfect song by this dude named Dawson Reigns. The song title? “If Crazy Wasn’t So Beautiful”. (Click.Listen.Enjoy)

See. Dawson can admit it…put it into song even… “Driving me insane/I should just walk away/and that would be doable/if crazy/wasn’t so beautiful…” But you guys live in denial…

Have you dated the girl who called you in the middle of the night, locked out of her apartment and stranded? Or the one who is constantly on the verge of being fired at work? Or, my favourite, has the ex-boyfriend/husband/babydaddy that she just can’t get rid of? Ever cover her rent? Play mediator between her and her BFF in a fight? And they fight every week…?

Ever have to explain for the 10th time that yes, that girl is REALLY just a friend and you’re not boning her, so please stop stalking the girl on facebook?

Yeah. Crazy Beautiful.

Why is she beautiful? Think about it. She HAS to be…because how many of you would put up with this bullshit if she was AVERAGE? No, you would not! If she was that “paper bag” girl, you know, the girl you only fuck at her place and never take out because she’d have to wear a paper bag over her head? You wouldn’t put up with this…if she called you in the middle of the night, you’d say “do I look like a locksmith?” If Ms. Average Face-stalked a girl you’d be telling her “look woman, we’re not MARRIED, stay out my business!”

So yes. The Crazy that you put up with is Beautiful. You know WHY you date her? Not just because she’s beautiful. Not just because she has the body you’ve been having wet dreams about since you were 13. No darlings, you date her for the same reason women date that “bad boy”.

She’s damaged. You know she’s damaged. But you think you can be her knight in shining armour and save her…just like women who date the bad boy in order to “reform” him. One moment, she’s sweet and kind, and the next minute, she’s crying and has sent you 25 text messages to tell you why she’s upset. She uses phrases like “confused”, “stressed”, “hurt” and you get swept up trying to fix it all. Go ahead. Protest. You’ll sound just like my girlfriends who protest when they date the fuckup – sorry “bad boy” – sorry – the guy who’s damaged. Lemme guess:  if she can just get rid of that ex/find a better job/patch things up with her girl then things wouldn’t be so bad? Yeah…until she finds the next drama to star in.

Why is she damaged? I dunno… I’m not a therapist. But I will say that the Beautiful has helped her in the past, that the men who came before you tried to save her…in fact, you know why that ex hasn’t let go? Because HE IS STILL TRYING TO SAVE HER! But she moved on because she knows that particular knight’s armour has faded.

Mr. Sam Sharpe
, a writer for Met Another Frog said this about Crazy Beautiful “there is no allure to crazy/beautiful woman. (Because) she’s beautiful you don’t notice the crazy until it’s too late.” Sam darling, again I call bullshit. Y’all know when she’s crazy, the same way we know that the dude is a bad boy…but I do want to point out one important thing:

You. Can’t. Fix. Her. You cannot chase away her demons, be her rock, or be “that guy”. You can commit to her, sure, but it won’t change the crazy, she will continue to be, well, Crazy until she learns to take responsibility for herself and fix her own problems instead of looking to others (uh, you) for the solutions.

I know darlings, she’s hard to let go of…or as one boy put it so eloquently, because “yo, THAT BODY!” So while you enjoy her beauty, her body, and her silky hair that you play with while she sleeps (that’s what another one said), enjoy the crazy, because it’s part of the package.

Note: beautiful doesn’t always mean crazy and crazy doesn’t always mean beautiful and no, I’m not some jealous paper bag chick with an axe to grind…I’m your average, slightly crazy woman who isn’t afraid to call it as I see it.

But I will say I experienced it close hand… apparently, my Father’s nickname for my mother when they were married?

“Miss Confusion”… *shrugs*


One thought on “The Allure of Crazy Beautiful

  1. I’m sticking to my original story: it’s an ego boost.
    Men like to have women trip over them. Just like women feed off men’s admiration, men feed off women’s angst.
    That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

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